Glass Dreams

Carefully wrapping the water glasses and small juice glasses, I cannot remember when I came to own them or from where they came.  Why do I bother, I ask myself? Why the care, why another box to be carried and stored and hopefully, eventually unwrapped and put away.  Nothing special about them, at an auction or flea market the whole box might be valued at a few dollars.  The glasses have lovely lines and feel good in the hand, but to anyone other than me they would likely be cabinet clutter, something to give away in a housecleaning frenzy some day. 

It occurs to me that the majority of things that I am wrapping and moving and storing have meaning only to me.  If something happened and I left this earth tomorrow, my treasures that I am packaging and paying dearly to move would only be a burden to others, with little to no value either emotionally or monetarily.  

Why bother then?  Is it merely the need to be surrounded with something familiar once I land in my new-to-me home? No, I think it is more.  Attached to these small items are not only memories, but also dreams for the future. Or perhaps, fantasies. Of friends dropping in for visiting and dinner. Conversation and playing with puppies. Of dinners with a man who touches my heart, the glasses softly shining in candle light, the conversation carrying on through warmth, curiosity and laughter until the candles and the night are small.  

So it is not glassware that I am wrapping and preserving, it is my hopes and dreams and desires.  And with care and luck, these will be unwrapped and enjoyed.  Soon.  

Just a silly meme I came across on social media.  But it made me think. It reminds me of what I told everyone when I was leaving my career and selling my farm.  "I want to do more and have less."   The past 7 years have indeed been that way and I still feel that way.  Yet as I sat here with moving boxes and packing paper jumbled all around me and I read the quote above I had a twinge that asked if I had lost this value?  If I feel that way, why are there so many boxes of schtuff to pack?  Maybe I am hedging my bets... trying to both have adventures and hold onto things.  Maybe I'm a poser and only talk the talk.  Or maybe it isn't a black/white thing.  Maybe one doesn't have to give up everything to have adventures.... maybe as long as adventures are not hindered or canceled by having to care or pay for things it's okay.  A balance.  Because one of the things that I find is that as I get older, you have so many stories and adventures packed in your head that sometimes it takes a tickle to open a story and pull it out to enjoy the memory again.  And sometimes the catalyst is an object.  So I will continue to pack my objects - paintings, pottery, books and furniture - and recognize that each of them is like a book of stories waiting to be opened and enjoyed again.